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5/13/2011

Beachy Homeschool

So, I think we'll stay.  Chris will have to quit his job, and we won't have enough money to pay for this tiny little condo, but it's okay.

We've got a little tent we can live in, and some cookies.

I've got it all planned out.

I've already started thinking about what I will teach the boys at our little Beach Homeschool.  We've got a schoolhouse...


See?  There ya go.

Now, curriculum.

Math.

If Lucas catches three little fish in his net, and Max squishes one between hit chubby little fingers, how many little fishies are left?






English Lit.

Recite 'The Walrus and the Carpenter' section from 'Alice in Wonderland'.  Go.


Physics.

If the force of the waves are greater than the tightness of the drawstring on your swimming trunks...  Every body's gonna see your buttermilk biscuits.






Biology.

Hey...  That trio of 65 and up women that just walked past are wearing the same style of bathing suit as Mommy...  Hey!  What the freaking heck??!!!  So now I dress like a senior citizen??!!  How wonderful to know that Grandma and I are looking for the same flattering attributes in a bathing suit.  "It's gotta cover the seat, and not be too tight across the bust, and cover up my hip replacement scar.  And be on sale.  It's gotta be on sale."  Great.  That's just flippin' fantastic.  Pass Mommy the cookies, boys.




Natural Science.

If Harry eats three pounds of sand, how much of that sand will be converted into energy, will it turn him into a super villian with sand powers, and how much will his next poopy diaper weigh?






I think this is going to work out.




3 comments:

katrina adams said...

oh my goodness. this was hysterical. btw, i've always loved physics.

Unknown said...

LOL too funny :)

annie said...

LOVE it.

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