Random Friday, Ya'll!!!

1)  I am no longer a human being.

2)  Human beings require sleep.  I have become some kind of mutant that survives on coffee, wetwipes, more coffee, Aretha Franklin, and chocolate leftover from Christmas stockings.  I look like I should be trying to lure unsuspecting children to my cottage made of gumdrops.

3)  You shouldn't judge a person who still has Christmas stockings hanging by the chimney with care on January 7th.  Really.  You shouldn't.

4)  Two of the three children who live in this house hate their new beds and refuse to sleep in them.  Refer to article 2.

5)  My oldest, the heir to our vast fortune, has tried to destroy two pieces of furniture in three days.  One, by rolling around in buttered popcorn on my light sand colored sectional, and the other by doing some kind of science experiment with a glass of juice and the breakfast table.  hypothesis:  In the amount of time it takes Mommy to try and put the baby down for a nap and take a shower, if I very carefully pour this glass of juice all over the table and let it stand in a puddle...  can I ruin the finish of this table?  By George, I think I can!

6)  Do not buy a light sand colored couch.

7)  Babies require less sleep than those silly books say they do.  Again, see article 2.

8)  Sometimes, not often, but occasionally, too much garlic really is too much garlic.  bleck.

And now, a few of the week's random quotes form Luke and Max

Mommy.  Dogs sweep.  (translation:  dogs sleep.  I wish dogs could hold a broom in their little paws and sweep.  It's time for Charlie to start earning his ten pound poodle keep.)

Mommy.  Wets talk about toes.

Mommy.  Daddy has arms.  And a body.

Mommy.  Baby Hawwison doesn't wike to walk.  Owny to be howlded.

(While I was singing in the car)  Mommy!  Stop sustaining that note!

Mommy.  Hawwison has no teef.  But I haff teef!

Have a great weekend!  May you sleep more than is strictly necessary and all of your furniture remain pristine and unblemished. 


emily anderson said...

ha, i love random posts...and i'm right there with you on the sleep train.

i.need.sleep. and lots of it.

Lib Perry said...

#3 actually made me snort out loud..my hubby took pity on me this week and took down the christmas decor.

April Irvin said...

So funny girl!! I guess you do know what I mean about the sleep problem. Maybe I should try some Aretha Franklin and maybe you should try DrPepper flavored Jelly Bellys (its how I stay alive) and I also look as if I should be luring children into a cottage! At least we aren't alone.

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