Branson has Something for Everyone!

In June, I told you that I went to Branson Missouri with my old college roommates.  In June, I also told you that I would tell you about it, "tomorrow".  Yaaahhhh....  Sorry about that.  It's August now.  So, I'll go ahead and tell you all about Branson.  I know you haven't been able to sleep.  Oh, the anticipation.

In this part of the country, there seems to be a huge, and I mean huge, love affair with Branson Missouri.  And I know that I may be totally alienating myself with this next statement, breaking hearts, loosing friends, but it just has to be said.  

I.  don't.  get.  it.  I just don't get it.


I said it.

I do not understand why everyone I know is head over heels for Branson.  (Do you remember that episode of Seinfeld when Elaine couldn't understand what the big deal was with that movie, The English Patient?  That's how I feel about Branson.  It's just like The English Patient.  Except really freaking hot.  Like, hotter than the southern gates of Hades kind of hot.  And has horrible traffic.  And more patriotism than one town can hold.  And variety shows.  Lots, and lots of variety shows.)

I can feel the collective gasp from the Branson lovers.  The ones who grew up spending steamy summers in Branson Missouri, sweat dripping down their skinny legs.  Grubby hand gripping their rock-candy-on a-stick nostalgic treat.  The Branson Lovers cannot understand, cannot even fathom how anyone in their right mind wouldn't love Branson.  

There's something for everyone!  No.  I've been there twice, and I assure you.  There is not something for everyone.  

Silver Dollar City is so fun! There's great rides, and all of that "old timey" charm!  You can watch a blacksmith make a horseshoe!  Umm...  Okay.  You had me at "Old Timey Charm".  Not really.  You actually lost me at "Old Timey Charm".

Although I don't subscribe to the, Branson has something for everyone theory, I must say...  They do have a lot of weird crap.  Weird crap that you won't find anywhere else.  Like creepy little shops dripping with fake pearls and lace, crammed with scary dolls and fat angels.  And a wiener dog figurine for every occasion you can imagine.  Fire Fighter Wiener Dog.  European Chef Wiener Dog.  '60's Sock Hop Wiener Dog.  Rapper Wiener Dog.  Construction Worker Wiener Dog.  Doctor Wiener Dog.  Bull Fighter Wiener Dog.  Really.  I lost track of all of the wiener dogs.  And my hands down favorite...  commemorative special edition, Presidential Pez Dispensers.  I know.  I feel the same way...  A part of me loves Branson just for those Pez dispensers.

My dear friend Anne is a Branson lover.  She grew up coming here as a child, and she gets all dewy eyed when she talks about the old fashioned candy.  Anne and her little family were visiting her parents in Missouri.  They traveled from Australia...  That's just so far.  The girl really likes Branson...  My other roommate Keeli and I don't get to see Anne and her family very often...  Australia is so darn far away...  and Branson was about halfway between her parents' house and ours... so, Old timey charm, here we come!

We rented a house that was big enough for all thirteen of us.  Seven kids.  One six year old, one five, one four, one three year old, and three two year olds.  It was a really good time.  I know that may sound hard to believe with all those short people, but it's true.  We had a great time.  It was wonderful to be with old friends again.

And to make each other's husbands uncomfortable with college days tales...  That was wonderful too.  Sorry, guys.

We mostly stuck around the house.  There was a neighborhood pool and a lake nearby, and we didn't tell the kids about the blacksmith making horseshoes across town, so they were happy.  The kids ran themselves ragged...  look at that tired baby!
And swam in the pool, and played on the playground...

Except for these two.  All they did was lean against trees, throw their heads back with light hearted laughter, and make out all the time.  
Okay, not really.  It was mostly pushing swings, wiping bums, kissing boo boos.  You know.  Normal stuff.

It was a great weekend!
Branson has something for everyone!


I Love OKDI said...

You forgot Outlet Malls and the Titanic exhibit.

The Cruce Family said...

Ok, so,I hate Branson too (well, that's not a fair statement. I have never been to Branson, but I just know I hate it.). That is... until we went to Big Cedar Lodge. You should try it sometime. it's PERFECT for families. It's really perfect for boys! Really, it is! And I can freaking promise you that you will not find fat wiener dogs, or fat angles, or whatever you saw in Branson. ;)

I love your blog!

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